the one with the new puppy

Scott and I got the sweetest puppy ever. Really. I'm not just saying that. She is soooooo calm and I love her.




She is a Lab mix of some sort. She was abandoned. The family that I used to nanny for, found her (along with her brothers and sister) on their farm. She is adorable.

She is Black and White, with the softest fur. Her name is Sadie-Grace "Oreo" Johnson.

The cats are not so excited about her. I let Sadie get used to the house a little before I let the cats out. Duchess came out and new immediately that something wasn't right. She kind of walked around cautiously.

She jumped up on the couch next to me and was licking me and such. She looked over and saw Sadie laying on the other side and realized Sadie was alive. Then she proceeded to jump half way across the room and back to the den. She hasn't been out since. lol. Hopefully she will warm up to Sadie and they will be great friends one day. Maybe that's just wishful thinking. We'll see.

the one with the new job

Well, the time has finally come. I got a new Job. Thank you God!

Last Tuesday, on my way home from work, I spent the entire drive talking to God. We were having a great discussion. I was saying how I didn't know if I was listening, or if he just wasn't speaking to me yet. I asked him if I should wait for the job at metrocare, or if I should be looking for something else.

There was another place I had applied, but they prohibited going to school. I didn't like the idea of not having that freedom to take a class. I wouldn't want to go back full time, but not even one class...not good.

But, I asked God if I should go ahead and pursue it. I didn't know what his plan was, so for me to completely turn something down didn't seem like the right thing either.

The next day I got an email from my mom saying one of the team leads for another team was interested in me (the lady texted my mom). I kind of felt like this was my answer from God. "Just wait for me."

Well, good thing I did. His timing is perfect. The position opened Monday (the day before this long discussion with God). Diane (my supervisor) just happened to be standing with the right people at the right time (or really maybe God just had her there at the right time). And, the job is perfect for me.

I will be a case worker for the RAP (rapid assessment and prevention) team. I will work mostly from home and my car. I have to go in for a meeting once a week at 10:00 am. Other than that I make my own schedule. I have to see a certain number of patients a week, but I'm a pretty organized person, so I don't see this as being a problem. My supervisor is not a micro manager and she is a strong Christian! She knows I am considering Grad school and she is okay with that. She knows I have no experience, and she is okay with that. Also, I get a cell phone stipend.

The best thing about this, is the process. I was so afraid of the process, but really all God wanted was for me to be okay with it. To be okay with whatever he had in store for me, even if it was going to be hard. As soon as I stopped holding on to this idea of how I wanted things to happen, God opened doors. As soon as I completely surrendered to him, he took control and good things happened.

God has taught me so much through this. Don't get me wrong the journey is no where near over and I am still learning a lot. I still don't know what the rest of my life (school, work, & family) looks like, but I know God has his perfect plan. I know he's going to take care of me & I'm definitely okay with the process. I may have to remind myself of this many times, but it's one step closer.

I do want to ask all of you who are reading my blog to hold me accountable to one thing. I don't want to be that person that gets a new job and then complains about every aspect of it. I don't anticipate this happening, but if I do, please do not be afraid to call me out on it. I want to be joyful about my job. That's not to say that I won't have a bad day or two, but I don't want those days to be the only ones I talk about.

God is Amazing!

the one with all the baptisms

Today was a different kind of church service. Instead of a "normal" sermon from our pastor, he talked a little bit about what baptism means and then 40 people were dunked! Many of those 40 were children. Not like in a baptizing babies kind of way. These children were taught about what it means and the commitment they'd be making if they decided to get baptized. These children chose to take that next step with God. AMAZING! God tells us that unless we become like children, we cannot enter the kingdom of heaven. I want to be like the children I saw (and helped) get baptized today. It was truly one of the greatest experience in my life to be up there baptizing my girls today!

p.s. I will post soon about my new job!

the one with cheap cable

I called Time Warner Cable today to see if there was anyway to suspend our cable for a few months without having to disconnect everything and send equipment back. The lady that I was connected with said "well let me look at your account and see if there is anyway I can make it affordable for you. " Alright. Wouldn't hurt....right?? Glad she did. She gave us the DVR for free for the next 6 months and saved us $30 on our monthly bill. Yippee! Turning off the cable is not a huge deal for me. Really I only have it for the DVR. I'm a tv junkie, but it's all network shows that I can watch online now. Now, I can still keep my cable and save money. So, moral of the story: if you have cable, satallite, or anything else that is a luxury item, try calling to see if they can give you a discount. It might just work and it wouldn't hurt to try. What's the worst thing that could happen? You'll end up paying the same amount your paying now!

the one with all the word vomit

I mentioned before that I trust God to provide my needs, but I wasn't okay with the journey. I know the "end", but I don't want to read the story. I think....THINK, I'm ready for the journey. I THINK I'm okay with what God has in store for me. I want to so bad, maybe I just need to say it?? So here I am saying, I am okay with whatever I might experience before God provides a job. I'm okay with not being able to eat out. I'm okay with turning off the cable for now. I'm okay with cutting back on everything if that is what it takes. At least I think I am. One step at a time. One tiny baby step at a time.

My journey through this terrifying time in my life continues. I still have a job, but it is supposed to end at the end of March. I did hear that the place I interviewed wants to hire me, but I'm not sure how legitimate this rumor really is, and I don't know when the hiring will happen. Is God telling me to wait? Or, should I be putting all my energy into finding a new job? The rumor came from a pretty reliable source, but should I put all my "eggs in one basket"? I need God to write it out in the clouds. I don't have enough faith in myself to listen. I am always second guessing. How do I know if God is really talking to me?

On another similar note, I'm still searching for what the future holds. What is next for me? Am I supposed to go to graduate school? What do I do once I get a job? Is that it? Can I start expanding my family? This process is one that I don't think I was really expecting to go through after graduation. I knew what I wanted to do with my life and now I don't. A terrifying place to be. I thought I knew what God wanted me to do in my life and now I don't. Even more terrifying. Which brings me back to "How do I know if God is really talking to me?". How will I know what to do next if I can't even hear what God is saying? Am I not listening, or is he not talking yet?

So I feel like I just vomited words everywhere. I'm not sure if this makes any sense, or if I've moved forward at all. I feel like such a mess right now. My thoughts are constantly running 100 miles a minute. So fast I can't focus on one. A whirlwind. I feel super emotional and I could lose it at any moment. Although sometimes I feel like I have no emotion at all. I am not okay. ARGH!

My goal this week is to learn to delight in the Lord and ALL he has to offer. I love him. I worship him. I am in awe of him. I want to delight in his will.